[MOUSE SQUEAKS]
[PENGUINS CHIRP]
[ALL CHEERING]
[SCREECHES]
♪ Adventure Time ♪
♪ Come on, grab your friends ♪
♪ We'll go to very distant lands ♪
♪ With Jake the dog and Finn the human ♪
♪ The fun will never end ♪
♪ It's Adventure Time ♪
JAKE: Ha!
[GLASS SHATTERS]
[LAUGHTER]
Here. Try throwing this one.
Ugh!
[GROWLS]
Here's one called "Caturday Surprise."
Throw it!
Ugh!
[CATS MEOWING]
[LAUGHTER]
PRINCESS BUBBLEGUM: Yeah, go on!
Get out of here!
Unless you feel like a fist cookie,
you better keep running!
What the heck is going on?
I have no idea, but it's probably best to stay out of it.
Yeah. Hey, look.
This one looks stupid.
Let's see how it flies.
Ugh!
Aw, lame.
Huh?
[GLASS SHATTERS]
Uh-oh.
PRINCESS BUBBLEGUM: Duke of Nuts!!
What have you done?!
Ohh.
Oh, no.
She thinks that nuts guy did it.
We got to go clear up what happened.
Don't worry, my dear.
I'll have you fixed up in no time.
Princess?
Are you okay?
Yeah, I guess if green and bald is okay.
[GASPS]
[LAUGHING]
Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo, boy.
I'm sorry. I can't stop now.
My dear, not to worry.
The medicine milk in this suit will have you healed lickety-split.
In just five days, you'll be back to your beautiful Bubblegummy self.
Five days?!
The grand meeting of Ooo Royalty is tonight!!
[POP!]
Ohh. [PLOP!]
Uh, hey, Princess.
There's something I should tell
you about that bottle that hit you in the face.
I already know, Finn.
The Duke of Nuts has always been a bad guy.
But now that he's done this, I'll never forgive him!
And it's not just because I hate the Duke.
I'd never forgive anybody who did this to me.
I'd hate them...
Yeah, but --
BUBBLEGUM: ...forever!
Forever?!
Finally, I have a witness to his misdeeds!
Two witnesses.
Jake!
Oh, Finn, my flawless, flawless champion.
Bring the Duke of Nuts to justice --
The justice of a cold dungeon!
[LAUGHS EVILLY] [POP! POP!]
[LAUGHS MANIACALLY]
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
She's completely bonkers.
What do I do?
If I tell her I threw it, she'll hate me forever.
Don't worry.
That won't happen.
We're gonna catch that Duke.
But we're the ones who threw the bottle.
Dude, look.
The Duke of Nuts is bad guys.
How do you know that?
Think about it.
If Bubblegum hates him so much,
then he must have done some rotten stuff.
I mean, maybe he even threw a bottle and turned someone ugly before.
Maybe you're right.
Maybe I am.
All right, then.
Just this once, we'll be vigilantes!
Nah, we're more like cops -- crooked cops.
[IMITATES GUN COCKING, BULLETS FIRING]
Princess, I won't rest until the villainous Duke is captured!
Oh, thank you, Finn.
[LAUGHS MANIACALLY]
Whoa, okay, and by then, hopefully you'll have taken care of... this.
Look yonder!
The Duke of Nuts' castle.
Duke of Nuts!
How are you?
By order of Princess --
um... Princess...
[GASPS]
Hello, Finn.
Are you here to arrest the Duke?
How did you know?
The Nuts told me.
For I am the Duchess of Nuts.
[GULPING]
Oh, should have asked if these were like her eggs or something.
I know of my husband's crime against the Princess --
a crime that you personally witnessed!
And why would you lie, huh?
Yeah. Why?
Oh, but he was once such a wonderful man.
He pet dogs, kissed babies.
We'd lie together underneath the cashew bush.
He even taught underprivileged nuts how to dance.
But somehow he's gone rancid!
These nuts tell me he must be executed.
Would you like to hear what my nuts have to say?!
That won't be, um, necessary.
Listen! Listen!
Whoa!
I don't get it, Jake.
How can the dude be evil if he pets puppies, kisses babies,
and lies with his wife?
What?!
You believe that?
She is nuts.
Listen, man.
Let's just go back and face the music.
Who cares if Bubblegum hates you forever?
It's no biggy.
Tons of people hate me.
Why, Jake?
Why won't you print my letters?
L-I-l hate you!!
Hmm.
[GASPS]
It's him -- the Duke of Nuts!
[BOTH BREATHING HEAVILY]
I'll break left!
You take the right!
Ugh!
I went left, too!
Ooh!
Wha?
You're way smaller than I thought you were.
Dude, that's not him.
No one will harm the Duke of Nuts.
I will kill whoever seeks to arrest him.
No! Please!
This has gone far enough.
That's the Duke of Nuts.
But I vowed to kill whoever did this to you.
They can't take you away, Dad.
[CRYING]
Who's the toughest little nut?
That's you.
[SOBS]
One second.
[CRYING]
Man, I don't know, Jake.
Why would Princess Bubblegum hate him if he was such a nice guy?
Just because he's a good father doesn't necessarily mean he isn't a villain.
That doesn't look like a villain.
I could probably think of a reason why that's
villainous if you gave me enough time.
Maybe. - Ugh!
Maybe we should just confess.
But then Princess Bubblegum will hate us forever.
Hey, man.
It's not that bad being hated.
Come on! Pick it up!
You son of a blee blob!
Oh. Sorry to make you wait.
I made these daisy crowns for you guys as a --
as a token of my gratitude for waiting.
Ohh, sorry, I -- I have to sit down for a second.
Oh.
I know this is an odd question,
but you wouldn't happen to have any pudding on you, would you?
Actually, yeah, I think I have one in my pack.
Oh. Oh, thank goodness.
I think I have a spoon in here, too.
What --
What happened to the cup?
Oh, I'm so embarrassed.
Now you know my shame.
I can't stop eating pudding.
What?!
I don't tell people because
I hate making them worry, but,
yes, I have a rare condition,
a pudding deficiency.
[SIGHS]
And I always end up eating all the royal pudding supply
whenever I go to the castle.
So that's why Princess Bubblegum hates you.
Yes, but I didn't turn Princess Bubblegum green and bald.
I would never do such a thing.
Ugh!
Of course you wouldn't.
You're too nice a guy.
I'm the one who threw that bottle.
I was gonna tell her, but then she started talking all crazy.
She said she'd never forgive me, and I didn't know.
Hey, it's okay.
People make mistakes.
It's all part of growing up.
And you never really stop growing.
Now you're making me feel even worse by being so nice about it.
Maybe I should just confess the crime and end all this.
Wait.
I think I might have an idea that will save everyone's reputations.
Halt!
Finn!
Did you find the Duke yet?
Not yet.
But you are in grave danger, Princess.
There is an assassin in these very woods dead set on stopping
you from reaching the grand meeting.
In fact, it's that rustling in the bush.
Rustle, rustle, rustle.
JAKE: I'm an ambush! Halt!
What's going on?!
Oh, did I come out too early?
[CLEARS THROAT]
What are you here to do, stranger?
I've come for the Princess!
I'm an assassin!
Um, guys...
Stand back!
L will stop him! Hyah!
Hyah!
Phew!
I'll kill you and raise your children as my own!
[SLOW MOTION] Hyah!
[SLOW MOTION] H-a-a!
Unh! Ugh!
Remember, it's just acting, Jake.
Sorry, dude.
Ooh!
Now, to kill you up!
But wait!
Surely this cannot be the fair Princess Bubblegum.
Where are her pink, flush cheeks?
The long, gooey hair? - Ugh!
Oof!
Clearly the princess travels elsewhere.
Later, Bubblegum!
Get out there, man!
I don't know if I can do this.
Go, go, go, go!
And that's how I,
the Duke of Nuts, by disfiguring
you beyond all recognition,
humbly saved your life.
Yeah! All right!
Yeah!
What was the point of this little play again?
[GASPS]
And why isn't the Duke clapped in irons?
She's right.
Innocent or not, I should accept what's coming to me.
Peppermint Butler.
Oh, no.
"Nut'n's" going my way today.
Hup!
Hup! Hup! - No!
Finn?
The Duke didn't throw that bottle.
Ugh.
Princess, I have something sucky to confess.
I'm the one who threw the bottle.
[GASPS]
I'm sorry.
But I knew if I told you, you'd hate me forever.
Hmm.
Well... l could never stay mad at you forever.
And you seem genuinely penitent.
I don't even know what that means, but thank you.
[BOTH LAUGH] Yeah!
[LAUGHS]
But that doesn't douse my hatred for the Duke!
Yeah, what's up with that hate?
That jerk always empties out my pudding pantry!
Aw, shucks.
He just can't control himself around pudding.
He goes coconuts for it because he has a pudding deficiency.
It's true, your majesty.
I -- I'm sorry for my medical condition.
Oh, my.
You poor man.
Of course you're forgiven.
Yeah, I don't believe a word from him.
[SIGHS]
I'm really sorry about making you temporarily ugly, Princess,
especially before the Grand Meeting of Ooo Royalty.
I wish there was some way to make it up to you.
Maybe there is, Finn.
Maybe there is.
[WHISTLING]
Hey!
Hmm? What?
You said "Maybe."
Call to order the sesquicentennial grand meeting of Ooo Royalty.
I now call upon the delegate from the Candy Kingdom.
Princess Bubblegums?
[CLEARS THROAT]
"It would be be presumptuous indeed to present myself against
the distinguished Princess to whom you have listened."
[YAWNS]
Buy a lady a drink?
[ALL GASP]
The Marquis of Nuts?!
Yes! But I didn't come alone!
Remember me, Jake?!
No.
- [GROWLS] - [SCREAMS]
[BOTH SCREAM]
FINN: Safety... Patrol!
JAKE: Safety... Patrol!
Safety patrol!
Safety -- oh, were we not wearing the uniforms?
Come on.
Let's keep looking for hazards.
Look out!
What is it, Dude?
Shushers, man.
Look there.
Just looks like an ordinary little town, man.
Yeah.
Suspiciously ordinary.
Oh, little house people.
Maybe it is just regular ordinary, not sinister ordinary.
Oh, no, wait.
Grass Ogre.
[CHUCKLES] Hey, chicken!
You're traveling "Eggspress."
[LAUGHS]
It's an obnoxious grass Ogre.
You get my joke, right? [LAUGHS]
Careful, you oaf!
Those chickens are rentals!
Oh!
We're having so much fun, huh?
[LAUGHS]
Drop that chicken. Huh?
You're under arrest. [STOMP!]
[CHICKEN CLUCKING]
Good.
Now get in your tiny cell.
Uh, oh.
Oh, uh, uh...
[LAUGHING]
Hey, Ogre!
Stop hazing these cute little houses!
Yeah, jerk ball!
My name is Donny, idiot.
Sorry, I was just trying to get your attention.
What kind of houses are you supposed to be --
uh, stupid,
uh... a dumb house?
[LAUGHS]
Hey, what's with your jowl?
Ow!
[LAUGHS]
I'm gonna mess with these housies some more.
Never! Ugh!
So, you want to wrestle, huh?
'Cause I know, like, this Ninja
move to get out of this lock instantly.
[GRUNTING]
Okay, now, first, I --
[GRUNTS]
Hey, you're doing it wrong!
Stop cheating!
Whoa.
You're doing it wrong.
What do you mean?
First, you roll your right shoulder forward.
Ugh, like this?
Yeah, but then I
counter it by doing this.
Hey.
[LAUGHS]
[GRUNTING]
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
Um, you need to take a break?
No.
[BREATHING HEAVILY] But if you need to, we can stop.
You baby.
Whoa, I zoned out there for a bit.
Did you win?
Nah, just taking five.
Donny's pretty good.
Yeah, well, you're okay, too.
Thanks, man.
DONNY: For a complete idiot!
Aww. - [LAUGHS]
Donald, quit all this jerky nonsense!
Ugh!
Unless you went to get gored by a forest Prince!
I was just kidding around.
But then you took it too far.
You guys are the real jerks.
[MUMBLING]
Pshh!
Donny is one mixed-up dude.
Nah, he's just rough-and-tumble like me.
But deep down, he's probably really sensitive like me.
You're a mixed-up dude, too.
- Hey, Donny! - What?
I was thinking that since you're a pretty good wrestler,
maybe you'd want to hang out with a couple of
rascals like me and Jake.
What?
Uh, I don't know.
Messing with these housies is pretty fun.
You got something better?
You sure this is a good idea?
If you come to the tree fort, we got video games and apple juice.
Really?!
I mean... Fine.
If it keeps you from crying.
Donny's problem is that he's treated as an outsider, like me.
You are not an outsider.
You wear cute little blue shorts.
I...am complicated.
DONNY: Uh, this fort isn't so great.
Not as cool as the fort I'm gonna build.
I call this chair!
Hey, Donny.
You should play "Bug Battle."
And, hey, can you put on some pants?
You put on some pants!
I have pants spun from spider webs by Pixies.
Okay, there's you, and here come the bugs.
Uh, yeah.
[CHUCKLING] Huh?
Oh, yeah.
Those guys will get you.
Ugh! This game cheats!
Ohh. [THUD]
Not cool, dude.
Have more apple juice.
It always makes me feel better when I -- ugh!
Donny, quit being a jerk!
What? What did I do?
Ugh!
Finn, I don't think this is gonna work.
I am incapable of all emotion,
but you are making me chaffed.
Everybody's getting mad at me for nothing!
You have to think about
how your actions make other people feel.
Oh. Hmm.
I don't understand at all.
Ooh, teach him that little empathy song I taught you.
Okay, yeah.
♪ Empathy, empathy ♪
♪ Put yourself in the place of me ♪
Your turn. - Uh...
♪ Empathy, empathy ♪
♪ Put yourself... ♪
Oh!
So it's like when I squeeze eggs out of chickens,
I should let them squeeze eggs out of me, too.
Um... kind of right.
Ugh! Ugh!
Someone needs our help!
Jake, you stay here and try to fix him while I deal with an unknown,
possibly deadly emergency.
Dude, trade me jobs.
[THUD]
DONNY: Jake, somebody broke your,
um, entire living room!
[GROWLING]
Quick -- act abandoned!
[GROWLING] [WHIMPERS]
Hands off the housing market!
[GROWLING]
Whoa! Hey! Ow!
Backpack!
Werewolves -- much worse than ogres.
Whoa!
Stop in the name of the law.
Is there somewhere I can trap that thing?
Well, we had a zoo, but he moved back East.
Of course, there's always the old well.
I'm not old.
Perfect!
[SNORTING]
Ha! Ha!
[WHIMPER ECHOING]
Slam bam in a can.
[GROWLS]
Huh?
Another werewolf?
What's up with this town?
[SCREAMING]
[SCREAMS]
[WHIMPER ECHOING]
[THUD]
Mr. Bank, are you all right?
Oh, it's fine. it's fine.
All my assets are insured.
Pardon, I have to go spackle my cracks.
Oh.
Why is this town just getting worse and worse?
[EVIL VOICE] Yes.
Why, indeed?
Hey, what are you werewolves up to?
We're not werewolves!
[GROWLS]
[ROARS]
[NORMAL VOICE] We're Why-wolves.
Uh, Why-wolves?
Creatures possessed by the spirit of inquiry.
[EVIL VOICE] And bloodlust!
What?
[NORMAL VOICE] Please.
Save your questions until the end of the lecture.
Our ecosystem -- at the bottom level are the house people.
Given the opportunity, we Why-wolves would easily wipe them out.
[GROWLING]
However...
[LAUGHS]
...Donny's presence is a natural deterrent.
His jerkiness is so powerful that it produces a pungent gas, obnoxygen.
To Why-wolves, it is a deadly poison.
[WHIMPERING]
But since you've removed the jerk Donny...
[SCREAMING]
...We will devour the houses,
and our population will rapidly swell until we are, in turn,
devoured by the cosmic owl.
Hoo!
Such is the course of nature.
But it'll be a pretty sweet ride up until that point.
[EVIL VOICE] Tonight we feast on the blood of the innocent!
[SNARLS]
[HOWLING]
[LAUGH EVILLY]
Oh, no!
I have to get Donny back!
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
Donny, you have to go right now and stop the Why-wolves from --
Aah, Master Finn has returned.
What's it going?
Thanks to you, I shall never be jerky again.
Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
No, this is all wrong!
We need Jerk Donny to make the obnoxygen and -- and --
Steady on, Finn.
Perhaps you're dehydrated.
It's as Jake taught me.
♪ Eight ounces, eight glasses, eight days a week ♪
I'll fetch you some tap water.
Are you wearing jeans now?
Surely.
♪ Got to get pants ♪
♪ Go get your pants ♪
♪ Button fly! ♪
I wrote that one myself.
Perdóname.
But, but, but...
But, but, but, yeah, Donny!
You're looking good in those jeans.
What did you do?!
Miraculous, isn't it?
I just kept teaching him my musical rules, and now he's perfect.
No! We messed up, Jake!
The house people are doomed if Donny doesn't go back to being town jerk!
[CLEARS THROAT]
I've no intention of being a jerk again.
Hmm.
But the housies will be wiped out if you don't.
It sounds tragic, but I'm turning over a new leaf.
Donny, you got to go!
Finn, no means no.
I'm sure you'll respect my wishes.
No! Stop! No!
[WHY-WOLVES SNARLING, HOUSIES SCREAMING]
Now, go be a jerk to those Why-wolves.
No.
[SNARLING, SCREAMING CONTINUE]
I'll use my musical messages to stop them.
Let's see.
I've got one on the ethics of laundry, "Crosswalkery."
Ooh, here's a good one.
[SCREAMING CONTINUES]
Man, the town is getting creamed!
By not being a jerk, you're being a real jerk, Donny.
♪ Comb your hair right ♪
♪ It's a good time ♪
♪ Sticky, sticky pomade ♪
♪ Short back and sides ♪
[SCREAMING CONTINUES]
Why isn't anyone paying attention to my words?
He sure is sensitive about his songs.
[GASPS]
It's 'cause they think your songs are dumb!
Wha?
What are you saying?
If we don't encourage his talent, he might revert back
to jerk Don-- oh, oh!
Hey, Donny, everyone says your songs are super balls.
They all think you're a real jerk!
But -- but I've changed!
Why would they say that?
♪ Empathy, empathy ♪
♪ Put your mind inside -- ♪
[LAUGHTER]
You are so pathetic...
so comical.
[LAUGHS]
[GROWLING]
Think I'm a jerk, do they?
I'm feeling... obnoxious!
[ROARS]
You wolves are cool!
Just kidding!
[LAUGHS]
Obnoxygen cloud!
Egress!
[WHY-WOLVES WHIMPERING]
[BREATHES HEAVILY]
ALL: The town is saved! Yay!
Get off of me, nerds!
You did it, Donny.
You're a full-blown jerk again.
What?! You're the jerk!
Housies, ready to hear my new song?
It's about how Finn will betray you just to save lives.
I'm sorry, Donny.
I'll never forgive you, Finn!
[ROARING]
Come on.
We can go stare wistfully at the lake.
I'd -- I'd like that very much.
[INDISTINCT SHOUTING]
Hey! I love being a jerk!
Thanks, Finn. Finn?
Finn, you loser.
[SNIFFLES]
I'll never... forget you.
♪ Come along with me ♪
♪ And the butterflies and bees ♪
♪ We can wander through the forest ♪
♪ And do so as we please ♪
♪ Come along with me ♪
♪ To a cliff under a tree ♪